How Often Should You Visit a Loved One in Assisted Living?

Your loved one has just moved into an assisted living community, and you’re thrilled that they’ll finally get the help they need and access to the activities they enjoy. But at the same time, you have plenty of questions and concerns about how you and your loved one will adjust. One of these may be how often you should visit.

Visiting your loved one is beneficial for both of you. Visits are great for social stimulation and relationship building, and they can be fun as you reminisce and enjoy each other’s company. But, you’re going to have to find the right balance in your visiting schedule to avoid too much stress.

This article will present some questions to think about as you work out how often to visit your loved one in assisted living. There’s no magic formula, but be assured that over time, you’ll discover a schedule that will satisfy you and your loved one and keep your relationship strong and healthy.

HOW CLOSE IS THE COMMUNITY?

Geography is a major factor in how often you visit your loved one in assisted living. If you’re right across town, you’ll be able to visit easily and frequently. But if you live a long way away, you’ll probably only get to visit occasionally. You can, however, work out an alternative solution to stay involved in your loved one’s care and life.

Don’t hesitate to contact your loved one’s caregivers. They’ll explain your loved one’s care plan and regular routines, and can also set up a series of calls with you so that you can keep close tabs on what’s going on. In many communities, staff members will even work with your loved one to connect the two of you through video calls. This way, you’ll be able to see your loved one face-to-face for extra peace of mind. In fact, you two might enjoy this so much that you’ll make it a weekly event.

IS IT A NEW PLACE?

Moving into an assisted living community isn’t easy. Your loved one is facing the stress of an unfamiliar place and a new routine. So be on hand to offer support. Visit more frequently during those first few weeks in a new community. You can help your loved one unpack, rearrange furniture, decorate and make their new place feel just like home. Your presence is important during this transition time.

Regular visits are especially necessary if this is your loved one’s first time living in a care facility. Leaving home behind will most likely be an extremely tough time for them, and they may not be completely pleased with the move. Your visits can reassure your loved one that this really is a good decision and you care about their struggles and concerns. Once the settling-in period is past, you may be able to cut back on visits a bit, but at first, visit often.

WHAT’S YOUR SCHEDULE?

Of course, you’ll also have to plan your visits around your own busy schedule. If you work, have children or have caregiver responsibilities for another loved one, this may limit the number of visits you can make. Be realistic. You’ll have to find a balance between your loved one’s needs and your responsibilities. Set up a once-a-week visiting schedule. But, if this doesn’t always work, make time to talk to your loved one on the phone, and visit every other week. The most important thing is to continually let your loved one know that you care and that you’re not abandoning them.

It may help to recruit your siblings and other family members to visit your loved one as well. Set up a family schedule so someone drops in for quality time once or twice a week. If you spread the responsibility around, none of you will find yourselves as stressed and frazzled. You might even grow closer as a family.

HOW MUCH CAN YOU HANDLE?

Finally, it’s important to ask yourself how much you can handle when it comes to visiting your loved one. This will depend on the relationship between the two of you and on your current state of mind and health. Always remember that you will not help your loved one if you’re exhausted and sick, so take time to care for yourself to avoid burnout. Then you’ll be in good shape to support your loved one.

Also, don’t compare yourself to other people. Everyone’s situation is different. You need to carefully assess how you feel and whether you can manage a visit on a particular day. If not, cut yourself some slack, and drop over in a day or two when you’re feeling better. In the meantime, give yourself time to enjoy a good book or a favorite hobby and re-balance your mind and body.

THE BOTTOM LINE

Visiting your loved one in assisted living can be a marvelous thing. You can provide necessary support and build or maintain your relationship. However, keep in mind that how often you visit will depend on your personal situation. There is no perfect number, but over time, you’ll discover what works best for you and your loved one. Then you can look forward to many great visits ahead.

SOURCE: KANSAS CITY